The Slow Goodbye

My father is slowly moving forward in his leave-taking.  He's far more somnolent than he has been, less responsive to external stimuli, erratically eating and drinking ( if at all).  He has an infection that is not responding to antibiotics, and the terms of his Living Will make more aggressive treatment off-limits.  He's been in a sort of suspended animation for over 3 years - but some new insult to his body happened recently and he's not bouncing back.

It's better this way.  He has minimal quality of life, takes enjoyment in nothing, does not respond directly to any talking, does not instigate goal-oriented behavior.  I believe (or I want to believe) he wants to be with my mother, who passed on a little less than 5 years ago.  He told me many times after her death that he was supposed to go first, bewildered at those times.

I love my father - and I want him to pass from this world to the next, because all that's here for him is a kind of hell on earth.

Good Health, Good News

for the first time in over 6 years, my partner has had two consecutive positive blood work-ups, three months apart.  you see, she has a mysterious, as-yet-undiagnosed blood disorder characterized by seemingly contradictory symptoms.  the first is blood clots in both her lungs and legs. this has happened four times and led to lengthy ICU stays.  often instantly fatal, we've been incredibly lucky.

the second is tenacious anemia, low hemoglobin.  this has led to extreme fatigue, mental haze and the like.  more times than i can remember she's had to undergo anywhere from 4 to 6 week courses of iron infusions.  she's also had blood transfusions.

so, one symptom is about over-coagulation and the other is about barely enough to even clot.

the illness has changed our lives drastically. rarely can we spontaneously go off on some small adventure, even a movie - it's now all about her energy level.  i do quite a bit more of the cooking, cleaning... household chores.   on the other hand, it's deepened our level of intimacy dramatically.  her illness has caused me to take better care of myself, because two sick people in the house REALLY doesn't work well.

four months ago, she finished with a 6 week course of iron infusion.  the doc had her come back a short time later for blood work up and the levels looked good.  so she sent us off for 3 months without any blood work (an eternity, comparatively).  my partner went in today for her three month check up and the levels are not just good, but even a little better than months ago.  holding steady is a  major triumph!!

WomenStrength

Just a few months ago, women were piling up against Obama - not a good sign as women traditionally vote more for Dems than Repubs.  Now we see the tide turning and the numbers have flipped, with even moderate Republican women considering voting Femocratic.  Why?  Well, it seems the Republican re-born obsession with controlling women's bodies is turning women away from whatever potential ticker might exist.  Both Santorum and Romney have made idiots of themselves trying to out-do each other when it comes to limiting contraceptives, making roe v wade more and more meaningless and in general intruding greatly into the personal lives of American women.

These are the same folks who want no part of government touching the lives of ordinary Americans - however, apparently intrusion into reproductive organs has never been more popular in the party of elephants.  Santorum in particular is throwing out line after line about how families should be run, women should stay home and home school, no pre-natal testing..........................the guy hasn't come up against a family issue for which he doesn't have the perfect solution.  Whereas he and Romney are neck and neck in the polls, more polls are showing the seismic defection of women away from their party, particularly in the all-important demographic of ages 34 - 56.

Thank God!!

A New Casulty

Olympia Snowe, longtime Republican Senator from Maine, has decided to resign.  She cites the intense hostility in Congress as the main reason.

This is a big loss.  She was a rare creature in the Senate. Pro-choice, pro-health care, a Republican moderate.  She played well with others, reaching across the aisle.  Yet she was being hounded daily, in D.C. and at her Maine home, by the Tea Bag Party elements.  She wasn't __________ enough.  Just fill it in with anything.

What a sad commentary, yet we all knew it was happening.  Been happening.  What sane person would want to be an elected official these days?  I listen to the Republican debates and I cringe at the personal attacks.  It all starts with accusations of being a flip-flopper.  Well, if my ideas and beliefs haven't evolved between the ages 20 and 40, or any ten year time period, just shoot me now.   Yes, there are basic beliefs that don't evolve, but many do.

Take the war in Iraq.  At the time, it was a near unanimous vote - the President and his boss (Dick Cheney) said there were WMD there.  There weren't.  But how many people even grocked to the idea that Iraq had nothing to do with 9/11.  Lots of people came to regret their votes, and regret their support of the war as it dragged on.  But it's still brought up - as if an evolving idea is somehow a character flaw.

Would you like to run for public office, open yourself and your family to the near-delusional scrutiny that comes with the process?  I know I wouldn't.

Separation between Church and State

Rick Santorum is getting way, way out of hand.  He's criticizing Obama for having the 'wrong theology', whatever that means.  I didn't know one could read the Bible wrong.  Santorum seems to think his interpretations of the Bible are the one and only correct ones.  This really isn't surprising - but it's getting out of control.

Santorum Sanctimonious has let his newfound power, after winning three non-binding caucuses/primaries, go to his head.  The only good thing about it is he seems to have knocked Gingrich out of the contest, becoming the evangelical alternative to Mitt Romney.  There's something rather scary about him, and it's not just his Tea Party backers.  It's that he truly seems to believe he is a Chosen One.

I don't want any Republican to win - but if Santorum becomes the nominee, the truest thing one could say is 'expect the unexpected'.  The far right fringes will have a candidate front-and-center, and that is just damn scary.

The Right Thing

You got to hand it to them - the Komen Foundation did the right thing by reversing their truly awful decision to suspend grants to Planned Parenthood.  And it only took three days (and $2,000,000 unsolicited dollars to P.P.). I may be naive, but I think it has something to do with it being run by a woman (if not naive, at least sexist, but the right way :).  Women work more collaboratively together, tending to seek cohesion.

It's the right decision, hopefully for at least some of the right reasons.  The Foundation took a body blow and definitely bruised their stellar image.  What were they thinking.  It's scary to think how strong the "pro-life" (read: pro-birth, not life, because once born, quickly abandoned by the policymakers, especially if born to a family in poverty) movement has become.

I hope this is a lesson to other organizations about the power of people to organize and speak out, non-violently.

Say it ain't so!!!

the susan g. komen foundation announced yesterday that they would no longer provide funds (just under one million dollars last year) to planned parenthood for breast cancer services to clients.  the announced reason is that they now have new eligibility standards for funded programs, and that cuts out any agency under federal investigation.

planned parenthood is being investigated by congress (you know, the place with a 13% approval rating), initiated by the tea party congressional caucus.  it's a thinly veiled attempt by the tea party to push their "pro-life" agenda.  pro-life until the fetus emerges and becomes a living baby.

what insiders say is that komen is bowing to right-wing political pressure - hedging their bets that donations won't be affected by this cynical step, may actually increase now that they've ended the relationship with this vital organization.

as a long-time komen supporter and volunteer, i am extremely disappointed and will have to re-think my support of the foundation.  i received an email from the local foundation "explaining" their actions.  the explanation rang hollow.

the political is personal.  it just is, and komen made a major mis-step.